He used the “H” word
I thought I would not have to confront this fear until at least 12 more years. He’s only 2 years and 10 months.
But, today, he said it. Nathan said, “I hate you, Mommy.” Did not know how to respond. Just stood there, looked at him in disbelief, and walked out of his room.
He was probably mad at the fact that I was holding Justin and not putting him to sleep. My brother had stepped in to take care of Nathan today.
I suppose he’s still not feeling well and wanted Mommy to comfort him. Not Uncle Boy.
Sigh.
The excuses are endless, but the anger is real. Nathan is upset at Mommy.
I was not ready for this. Still don’t know how to react, what to say.
This is a dark day in mother hood.
June 25th, 2008 at 5:49 am
Oohhhh.
I’m so sorry. That must have felt horrible. Just know that he doesn’t mean it. You are the most important person in the world to him. He loves his mama.
June 25th, 2008 at 6:11 pm
I’m very sorry you had to hear those words. They are hard to hear. I’ve heard those and other likeminded sentiments from daughter before. Thankfully it has been so very rare and I can recall each instance but each time it was a bit shocking. My personal experience with her has been when she was very young that she didn’t even know what it meant that she was just feeling frustrations and parroting words. Often times it was when she was tired, sick, stressed about something in her life, or when she was feeling the stress of others around her.
Developing all those emotions and not knowing how to deal with them - just knowing they need moments of release. In time, you and Loi will teach him how to cope with his frustrations. Once my daughter learned what the word hate really means and could grasp that concept, it really isn’t a word I hear out of her mouth other than - Oh, we’re having that for dinner, I hate that! =P
Hang in there Mommy, he loves you very much. Try to get a bit of R&R if you can squeeze it in. A nice bubble bath, a good book, some writing time, whatever it is that you do that is just for you…you deserve some Jennifer moments to put some breathing space on the dark motherhood days.