I remember why I married you
Being one of the first to marry in our social circle, we were often asked, “So, how does it feel to be married?” Surprisingly, the idea of legally and religiously binding our relationship did not change the dynamics of it all after doing so. My answer was always, “The same.” And, even now, with Nathan, and especially with Justin, I still feel the “same” about our relationship–that somehow we fit together so perfectly. For three weeks, couped in our 800 square foot guesthouse, I attempted every technique imaginable to help Justin overcome oral aversion. After two weeks of battling acid reflux and a cold, and experiencing pain as he drank, he developed an aversion to anything that touched his mouth. By the end of the week, when his feeding had dropped to half of the recommended volume required for his weight, I really had it. I mean, my sanity was on the brink of insanity. I had done everything the doctor had recommended short of changing his medication to a stronger prescription, Prevacid. Yet, I refused to give up and pass the task on to give myself a break. I’m his mother for goodness sake! “Help me, ” I prayed, “please give me strength.” Enters Loi. I am reminded that we’re a team, where one’s weakness becomes the other’s strength. He relieved me of feeding duties for 3 days as I spent time with Nathan, taking him to the park and mall, and just getting out. For 24 hours, every 2 hours, Loi woke Justin to feed (even in the wee hours of the night). Turns out, all Justin and I needed was a break from each other. Though I never showed my frustration with Justin, he somehow sensed it, and became frustrated as well. When Loi took over, Justin regained his confidence and stamina to drink more and more, though not quite as much as before. “Peaks and valleys,” my husband reminded me, “peaks and valleys.” And, so is the life with our little one.
November 19th, 2007 at 11:07 am
Dan and I will have been together for 6 years this coming Sunday. Saturday he took the phone and sat listening to the hold music (a single wretched light jazz song — torture for the musician he is) for 4 hours straight because I was about to lose it. I felt much the same way: there’s no question why I married him. Somehow it doesn’t even matter that he never actually got through to customer service and that I will have to make the call again myself sometime this week. I know he loves me and he was willing to share in the responsibilities of our lives when I was overwhelmed by the details. I am glad you also have the blessing of a supportive, calming spouse. I have no idea how I would manage without mine, and so far the load I have been asked to bear is light. I can only imagine how dear he will become when we face greater trials together.
Nikki
November 26th, 2007 at 11:50 pm
Loi is a good person. I’m so glad you had a rest from all the daily duties. You have been a wonderful mom. I enjoy reading about how much strength you have. It keeps me motivated. When I read about thinking about Justin’s heart, I can relate so much with my dad. We never know what the next day will bring. We just take it one day at a time, like you said. I hate not knowing what the future holds, it makes your plans that much more difficult. I continue to pray for your family.